Declaration : Celibacy

One time I had a discussion with a close friend. One that we’d be on the phone for close to two hours non stop!

Getting deep with growth and insightful conversation .

Man’s very motivational….
He said to me ,

Let me confess this to you ;

“I’m not going to get married”

I didn’t quite hear that properly you know? So I checked my phone and it’s his name on this call . I was shocked and I scolded him !

I asked questions

So many questions

He answered them all

He asked questions and I did too .
To my first question, hey why?

Before the whys I had exclaimed

[“Oh my God” , “Are you serious”  “what is wrong with you?” “Are you okay?”]
He laughed and I yelled

“it’s not funny!”
Why I reacted that way ?

Obvious?

It’s unusual

Never heard anyone say these words to me

I mean ,this is AFRICA !!! GHANA!
Growing up we’re nurtured to come to terms with systems and ideologies and so on and so forth.

Automatically as you grow ,your system prepares for this institution called *marriage*

People are betrothed ,others hope to find love someday

Others go on a hunt looking for their lost ribs and souls.

This is the Ghanaian training

And there’s nothing wrong with that
Systematically , it becomes weird for a young man , handsome ,honest and modest wake up one early morning .washes his face says to his mother ,” mummy I don’t want to get married when I grow up”

His parents will look him in the eye and say , you’re Young you don’t understand what you’re saying. Come on go get a nap.
Now for an adult ,in your marrital age saying these words .you must be possessed

Are you gay?

You must be delivered by the holy spirit. Let’s go see prophet Kumchacha !
It’s only natural that everyone will find you very weird to want to be alone for the rest of your life.

Who influenced you?

You’ve been in this house all your life ,did anyone act any differently?

I mean ,how did you come in this world?
To answer to the questions why we want to get married ;

1.first and foremost

We’re nurtured to come to terms with this system that every( girl and boy )hope and prepare to be married some day .

2. For companionship ,for a man will leave his father’s house to live with his wife and the two shall become one . Reference from the Bible as a Christian.

i. People fall in love ,they believe they can’t live without each other so they get married

3. For procreation ,I love babies and to get it ,I’d do it the right way with a father to train and teach them
That was my reservation on the questions asked …
To his reasons and answers

Ghanaians, Africans tend to impose unto man what they feel is the right thing to do.

If you tend to use a different route or probably find a peaceful path to your destination,then you’re weird and different.

You must be disrespectful , rude etc.

He’s come to a point in his life where , responsibility to him in this day and age is been misunderstood and immorality in abundance.

People find wives ,swear oath and do not keep it. I mean no disrupting the fact that ,they are humans . However these women are human too with feelings and needs which needs to be attended to and not lied to or disrespected.
Looking at his dreams ,path and aspirations, he’s not sure he can give these to any such woman . He would love to give her all the time but for peace and harmony sake ,he’d choose this path to save anyone’s daughter any insecurities , loneliness and hardships.

He’s a man of virtue 

Who deprives himself off the love he deserves to make man happy.
In conclusion :

I’d like to agree with him on the imposition nature of Ghanaians. 

“This is how it’s done ,you can’t do it differently”
So do I support him if that’s what he wants to do . Come to think of it ,

If he had said he’d like to be a nun ,you think this rather is positive? Than his points on staying true to himself and life?

You know you’re bias !
Nothing wrong with wanting to be married and following paths that have been laid down for you since generation .

Does it make you happy? 

That’s the question! 

Will you be happy?

If your answers are yes yes to these . I’m more than happy for you.

You chose that for it makes you happy , can another person choose something else and be happy in peace as well?

Thank you then .
The same Bible that had said whoever finds a wife ,finds a good thing. Didn’t forget to add that some women wouldn’t be married ,others will with no children to call their own .others wouldn’t be married yet with children to call their own.
Knowing these things , God had prophesied .

In manifestations , we’re in denial and angry at what doesn’t belong or have anything to do with us.

Let’s not pretend!

You probably said to yourself many times you’re not going this direction anymore, you’re tired ,you’re done!

This is to say you’re not alone

I’m with you ,we are a bunch of game changers

Let’s make up our minds in changing systems and ideologies…

We want it but not as perceived by society

So we’re celibates, peace and harmony is what we look for . We’re a happy bunch!

Come join us if you’re happy ,we can do this journey right !

We’ll get there!